What is real love?

I  relate to the pain and humility, of wanting someone you had been with before..
Here is an eye opener..
  ‘HE’ must feel the same about us.
Otherwise we’ll live in that prison forever..
If we accept it for what it is, than WE are in control, and the pain will slowly subside.
I feel that I qualify to give advice.
I handle this pain with dignity.  The pain of wanting and not having, is  what I’m here to adress.
There is no doubt in my mind that love exists.
The form it takes is sometimes very unconventional and sometimes forbidden and dangerous.
Real love doesn’t manifest in materialistic gifts nor in what one can do for the other..
It’s what you keep in your mind.
Love stories often end in tragedy.
This is because the brain can’t handle and accept the disappointment  it often comes with it.
Having someone you can relate to is often a perception of the truth.
This is when our desires become strong .
We try so hard to make things go our way even thou there is no chance it ever will be.
No one is that compatible.

A feeling of euphoria sweeps over our entire existence and it doesn’t leave us.
What do we do with it?
How can we handle that powerful attraction?
Specially if its unrealistic.

For the past three years, I’m living with, I am speaking from my own experience.

Mine is not a forbidden love, is an unrealistic love.
One that will never amount to anything more than
;(  *It is what it is *  ;(
He is half my age, and in a relationship,
It wasn’t one sided.
I knew for a fact that he shares my sentiments.
So I chose to believe.

I met him as a client. He had debilitating back pain and could barely lye on the table.
It’s  normal for a patient to become infatuated with their healer, specially when they are at the most vulnerable state.
For some reason this young man hit a core in me that I never expected..
I’m mature and very experienced with affairs of the heart (Through my loins)
I should have known better.
** Know what? **
It hit me like a ton of bricks.
He  pursued me, I kept declining..
My mind became a war zone
A tug of ~yes no ~ yes no..
I had no sexual desires for him.
Yes extremely good looking, extremely intelligent and very laid back,
I had no intentions of getting involved with any one,  let alone with a boy..
He is younger than my son.
How crazy and demented is that?

Somehow, I stopped being logical.
I listen to some womanly advise.
I’m 59 how much better can this be?
****  🙂 🙂 🙂  ***
Doesn’t this sound like a story book novel?

~~~~~~~~~I dove into it!….. Blind folded!~~~~~~~~~
Our first encounter he showed up with a bottle of wine and smelling so so good.
Nothing after that was ever worth mentioning.
He stood me up. When he would show up, empty handed, watching the clock and fully benefiting from a free massage.
Not long after that first dive, I hit bottom of the pool.
I confronted him about his disrespectful behavior.
He confessed he has a very beautiful girlfriend who he loves and respects,
At the same time he can’t stop thinking about me.
He loves spending time with me, chilling in my apartment and just being around me makes him happy and complete.
He is not free to see me often yet he hopes I understand and can accommodate him.
How do I deal with this?

In a mature relationship we have two choices.
One is to accept what he offers, or completely back off.
I believe we are two old souls, in need to complete our karma.
We met for a reason and the joy of spending time with him
overpowered any unrealistic demands I should have..
How else can I, or should I view this.
I don’t think I’m that desperate or stupid..
He is not mine, he belongs with someone else. (Poor her)
He is willing to offer me what he can and I have no problem accepting it..
After all, what he offers is extremely special and very fulfilling.
I was lying to myself in believing I meant something to him.
Sex quickly was no longer part of the equation..
I envisioned it, and I gave into the temptation
~~~~~~~~~It wasn’t even close.’~~~~~~~~~
Yet the feelings and desires remained strong.
What do I feel ?  What do I desire?
The outcome of  this story.
He turned out to be a catfish

A lying, sadistic, manipulating. S.O.B.
Now it’s up to me to face ** My reality ** and to let him go.
Even if it kills.
He may be my muse 🙂
Young, beautiful, and very naughty..;)

If you care to share
@Lunch with Lu
I’m here for you

**Love should never make us beg**

2013-09-24 08-40-54.553